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Vulnerability- Here is My Story

by JANET on Feb. 3, 2015

After a thirty-two year old marriage, of playing the game “Should I stay or Should I stay”, I decided I was  finally leaving, and I was starting over at 63 years old. That is quite a declaration but now is my time.

I am rather embarrassed to share that I have been stuck in the same story for a very long time. It nearly exhausted me.  I kept dancing around the same story, the story of not listening to myself, and letting go of my hopes and dreams.  I was ready.

I was beginning my life solo and changing my life in a very dramatic way. I was making big changes and leaving so much that was familiar to me.

I have been on my knees several times in the last few years. I have surrendered and asked for guidance more times than I can remember.

For many years I said I could not share my story for after all what would people think. I was the yoga teacher, the health coach, the life coach, and it appeared that my life was together. Now I have opened up and shared my vulnerability and I am feeling more freedom than ever before. In my heart I am feeling safer, more loved, and freer than I ever did in my marriage. I have learned to trust, to find my inner voice, and listen with my heart and body. I have found true courage even in the midst of complete terror.(the voice that says “YOU Can Not Make It”)

My 2015 word of the year is value. I pay attention to what feels like love and I am awake now. I am on a clearer path even with the bumps, cracks, and a few backward steps. This journey may be long and hard but I have a sense of courage, resilience ,creativity, and determination that I never realized I had before.

I am becoming more of myself! I am valuing that small voice that is getting louder and that is really worth listening to.

Anne Quindlen says “The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.”

These writings cover things that I am passionate about, ideas that can help you sort out some of your stuff, ways to find more GRACE and CLARITY as well as ​tools for the life ride.  Please send me a note about what you liked or did not like about my writings. 

- Thank you so much, Janet